31 May 11 12:12 pm
Just an opinion from a potential buyer. You've got some great content on there, there's a couple of things I think could be improved in terms of appeal:
The first thing I see is ads. Not only that, but there are heaps of things competing for my attention and the buyer can get confused as to what to click first. What I think could be improved is having less options of what to do initially. If you've read "The Science of Influence" by Kevin Hogan, more choice actually makes people more confused (ironically). So it's better to have the perception of 2 choices, rather than 20 if that makes sense?
What might work is a clear set of instructions that are the focus - Click here, enter name and email address, get your free report. Something like that.
The other thing I might alter is the header - How To Increase Weight. It's a little hard to read the red text, and the text doesn't have the kind of emotional impact that would 'grab' my attention. Maybe the picture of weights in the background can be changed to a ripped muscle-man, the kind that your customers might want to be like?
And there's an awesome paragraph you have further down the page that I think something like this would work really well near the top, ie
"Let’s face it; nobody wants to be skinny and weak. Deep down everybody desires the ripped, muscular physique of a UFC fighter or an NFL running back. That’s the kind of look that attracts the ladies and earns respect from the guys. But the question that perplexes many of you is “how do I get that look?”
That paragraph is Gold, if it was my site I might use that at the top.
There's a couple of spelling errors as well here and there, but I think the content is absolutely great. I just think you need to hook them in to want to read further, and you can do that by making a bit more of an impact at the beginning. My 2c :)
Use the facts from the past to create the facts for the future
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