01 May 12 3:57 am
I see some visual issues. Like you say, they may relate to the theme you're about to leave.1
. Top text on masthead
is hard to read. Characters are jammed together. If you have Gimp or Photoshop, you can get exact control over leading, etc. and then use an image for text (but no keyword value, except for the image alt text).2
. Black on a solid color
is never a readable choice and also looks amateurish (bottom of masthead).3
. "The Essential Guide On
..." sounds strange and stops me. The normal usage is "The Essential Guide to..." 4
. Many of the text lines are too long
. Keep length down to 56 to 65 characters (including spaces). This is easier to read and makes text more "inviting" and "friendly" during the instant one is deciding whether to read it or not.5
. Too much space between paragraphs
, but not enough at left and right margins
. Plenty of white space (especially on the left) is important for that "clean professional" look.6
. Check marks and bullets
are too close to text and when text wraps, it should stay same as first line.7
. The photos
are OK, but don't look right because of the inconsistency in their presentations. Make them all the same "toned photo print" color as the first - or all the same as one of the others, anyway all the same except for visual content - and all the same size (even the same aspect ratio, if possible).
The bottom photo is far better than the other 2 in subject. #1 shows a guy by himself looking rather severe and intimidating (whereas the woman reading wants a loving relationship). The #2 photo shows a guy ignoring his woman - also not what she wants to see. Don't know if you used these 2 negative images on purpose, but I'd say you need promising images of the visitor's "dreams come true". 8
. [b]"Purchase Now"
"Purchase Now" is a direct command. I don't think it's a good idea psychologically to "tell people what to do" on button labels (in spite of the fact that practically everyone does it).
Instead, restate your Unique Value Proposition (UVP). Clicking on a purchase button is an action requiring strong motivation because it involves both taking an action and spending money. So you must do something to at least partially neutralize their anxiety. A better button would show the benefits of clicking. something like [ Download to Discover What Men Want ] or [ True Love Starts Here ], you get the idea.
Maybe just me, but I think the first Buy Button is shown too soon. It can annoy people to be asked to purchase before your offer is fully presented - it's that "Don't ask for marriage on the first date" principle (almost a pun in your case). Proper sequencing in the sales process is critical. Remember the AIDA sales cycle [Attention/Interest/Decision/ Action]. Aren't you asking them to "AA" and short-circuiting the "ID"?
I know it's advised to show a buy button above the fold, but there must be a lower position that works. maybe after the "too much space between paragraphs" is changed you'll get more sales copy above the fold - or maybe not with shorter lines.9
. Price is a critical product specification. I so hate it when I'm forced to click on a buy button - just to find out the price. You can expect massive shopping cart abandonment if you don't show the price in front.
OK, I just discovered the price, kinda hidden in a big gray text box at the bottom of the page. I'd make it prominent above the fold. Will they even scroll down if no price is given above the fold. Perhaps check your metrics to see if people are leaving in a few seconds, instead of scrolling down the page?10
I'd mention the guarantee earlier in the sales process too. A guarantee is one of those anxiety reducers - so it needs to sit right next to the buy button (even if you have to repeat it). You can just use a small guarantee symbol and link it to a full guarantee farther down with all the details.
I've noted that ClickBank offers a 60 day 100% Money back guarantee and requires their members to do the same. I assume they have done a lot of research and found that 60 days (and the rest) is ideal. So I always use their type of guarantee.
Another anxiety neutralizer is an incentive. You mentioned the autoresponder, but what do you offer as incentives to click the buy button?11
You don't show why women should believe your advice, other than "you're devoted to the topic" and 1 testimonial. Don't know what more you could do, but there must be something.
I don't think opening with "Dear Friend" sets "a tone of honesty" - quite the opposite. Chances are that, far from being a "Dear Friend", the reader is a total stranger - and they know that.
I didn't get into the text, but hopefully others will.
It seems a promising product and I wish you well with it!
Hope this helps...