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Funny spam comments on our blog

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markling
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Funny spam comments on our blog

Hopefully you'll find this as amusing as I did. Like all bloggers we get our fair share of spam comments, spammers who spit out any sort of rubbish just to get some free publicity, and possibly a backlink to their site.

In many cases, there isn't a link, just an email address (which often ends in ru!) but some spammers do that so they get approved for their first comment then (in some blogs) they can freely post comments without moderation in the future.

Here are a few we've had recently ...

  • Hello. Great job. I did not expect this on a Wednesday. This is a great story. Thanks! (I guess you had a one in 7 chance of getting this right but sorry it was published on a Monday)
  • Wow! Thank you! I always wanted to write in my site something like that. But I don’t want to compete with your article. (With writing skills like that I don't need to worry)
  • What add-on’s you are using for your blog? It looks like you have a great taste! (Have a great taste? Hands up who had add-ons for breakfast?)
  • You are a very smart person! Great post indeed.(Flattery in this case will get you nowhere)
  • Hi there, I found your blog via Google while searching for your sites exact keyword. You are doing really well on Google SERPS ;) (see above)
  • The site has nice and unique wordpress template. (Nice comment except we don't run WordPress for our blog)
  • After reading you blog, I thought your articles is great! I am very like your articles and I am very interested in the field of Free trial. Your blog is very useful for me .I bookmarked your blog! I trust you will behave better from now on; I hope she understands that she cannot exepct a raise. (Started out almost normal ...)
We do sort through all the blog comments to make sure legit commentators, like our Affilorama members, are being heard but there sure is a lot of rubbish to get through (we had about 25 from the same spammer in one day)! At least the comments above are more readable than the few coming through that soley consist of an expletive repeated 5 times. All I can say is Why?
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mack45
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Hay it would be quite funny if it was not causing you such a hassle. I had a funny ad like that put on one of my "three step ads" they use google adsense and put ads on the reloading products like how to cure back pain. Another was how to cure depression. I guess I could reload a hunting rifle and cure their problem but some how the logic evades me.
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wollowra
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Hey Mark,
I had to ban 2 people in the past 2 days for this.
The same guy posted 3 times in 1 minute with just crap.
Deleted the posts and he has now gone bye bye.
Pity they just sign up with a different username.
Maybe they get paid too much allowance from their parents as they are living in the basement, so they can just sit around all day posting stupid comments

Anyway.. got my glasses on..lol

Troy
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smuigal
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These end up in my spam box so they are easily deleted. Do you guys use that Akismit in WP? It works really well for me. I recognize those comments. I will often times check my spambox just to make sure nothing good is in there which once in a while there is an honest coment. Maybe they got flagged as spam somewhere else.
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No pain, no gain
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unit
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Hey Mark,

“Just desired to let you realize I enjoyed browsing on your world-wide-web internet site.”

lol, that's my best one!!

Good luck to all

Unit
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cterao
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TLCs newest reality series wrote:No pain, no gain


I love the irony of this...
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Clayton
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jmpruitt
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true clayton. Some of my posts about spammers get the most spam too...

I heavily moderate my comments too. sometimes valid comments wind up in the trash because they werent really relevant to the post, but for the most part they are pure rubish. The sad thing is, the reason they keep doing it is because it works. there are so many lazy bloggers that dont take the time to moderate that the crap gets posted, and they get their links. The only way to stop the crap is for people to quit being lazy and do a little work.
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esolutions
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I got one today on my action sports site:

"Hello, this webpage really makes me think of a great website I saw on how to get pregnant fast."

Sick and wrong!
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gradyp
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I was just looking through the spam posts on a blog of mine... I had 2, almost identical, messages from 2 "different" people. It was almost as if the comment had been (badly) spun and submitted with a different name! :D

Seems like I'm getting mostly spam comments on that blog, and most of those are linking to sites that don't have anything to do with my site. If the comments were a little more on target and referenced stuff the post, I might think of letting that point slide (unless it was linking to certain types of sites that are borderline inappropriate for some people who might be viewing my site), but the comments are so vague and general, I can't help but laugh as I hit the "empty spam box" button.
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gradyp
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And as I was posting that, I was deleting comments and this one popped up:

"Substantially, the post is actually the sweetest topic on curing acne naturally. I concur with your conclusions and will thirstily look forward to your future updates."

Really? First off, that post wasn't even close to being about acne, so how could you agree with any conclusions I reached. Second, didn't realize that post reached any conclusions, since it was more of a list of different tools you could use to help with writing a novel. And third... "thirstily"? need I say more?

Have fun everyone!

Grady
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esolutions
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@Grady, The synonym spinner from hell! LOL
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myonlinetraininghub
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I too get a bunch of spam rubbish and it got me thinking about a few things

1. Do the search engines count it as legitimate traffic (they can track the originating IP of the commenter/bot) and give your site a + for having lots of traffic to it?

2. If you approve some of the spam comments (some do make sense) this will also make your site look like its engaging people so another + from the search engines. But do the search engines keep a list of comments made by these bots/spammers and know when a comment is spam - and hence not give your site its +

3. If the search engines do keep a list of spam comments to check against, would editing the comment before approving it get around this?
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gradyp
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Oh, you gotta love this one!

    Why have you deleted my post? It was very useful information and i assure atleast 1 person found it helpful unlike the rest of the comments on this website. I’ll post it again. Tired of getting low numbers of useless visitors for your website? Well i want to inform you of a brand new underground tactic that makes me personally $900 every day on 100% AUTOPILOT...

Hmmm.. Gee... why would I delete your last post? Probably for the same reason I'll delete this one!

    What is the circumstance of this? I absolutely do not understand you. But as I said before human beings are sophisticated beings, they do things that are not always right . Well could be I have a spoiled day , I may go and do some training, maybe that assists to gain some decent mood

Huh?

    its up there buddy, on the initially hyperlink, ..i hope that helps..

Not really :D

This is just some of the latest round in mine.
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chris72
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Man I hate it when they mix the red pills with the green ones!

We had one who was being held hostage and would be killed if we didn't approve his/her comment....Oh dear, another spammer funeral :o)
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gradyp
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Okay... I was just scanning through some spam comments on a blog of mine and came across this one:

I am still a little mislead on your entry here. Do you really believe this? I don’t say you are wrong, but you’ll have to create a good discussion to convince folks of your point.


The problem? The post wasn't even trying to make a point! It was merely telling what I was up to!

If nothing else, spam comments give us laughs :D
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jmpruitt
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just got another one that made me go "huh?"

"Pukkah, they exigent to be taught that filing lawsuits is not the resolving to a closed piracy. As contrasted with, it’s to bit something most skilled than piracy. Like hypnotic of use. It’s altogether a straws easier to spew far-off down the efface iTunes than to search the Internet with imperil of malware and then crappy suggestive blood the gentry, but if people are expected to out of steal loads and curb permissible of ages, it’s not salubrious to work. They united would contentedly espouse a feign pro tem anterior to people working order software and Network sites that twenty dozens it ridiculously teachable to infringer, and up the quality. If that happens, then there pass on be no stopping piracy. But they’re too watchful and shocked of losing. Risks prevail to be joyful!"
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gradyp
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WHAT? ROFL That totally makes no sense whatsoever! If that's a spin, it is spun so terribly that the original meaning is completely lost. Utter nonsense! :D

Mark, have you had any other good ones lately?
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michellerana
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How about this..

So, you wanna buy some drugs?

Sounds like an offer from a drug dealer.

I would also like to add that there are some comments that seem relevant but are actually spam. See example below:

As the above title suggests – one of the biggest mistakes any article marketing method makes is to avoid the pain in writing original articles and instead opt for copy-paste or applications like article spinner. What i myself have noticed is thathalf of such articles start with “You think 6 packs is easy to make ……..” and end with “Get this blah-blah product and get cut”. Now frankly half of you reading this blog think “Yes it makes sense – 6 packs in 1 week”. What you don’t realize is that people only try to scam you or rob you of your money and don’t even seriously work for it. This is one of the arts of article marketing. To write articles which detail your problems and lure into a non-existent remedy which could cure your illness.



At first glance, it seems like the comment is relevant. However, I have a gut feeling that something is wrong so I did a Google search and found that this was posted 42 times on different sites!
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rickmci
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jmpruitt wrote:just got another one that made me go "huh?"

"Pukkah, they exigent to be taught that filing lawsuits is not the resolving to a closed piracy. As contrasted with, it’s to bit something most skilled than piracy. Like hypnotic of use. It’s altogether a straws easier to spew far-off down the efface iTunes than to search the Internet with imperil of malware and then crappy suggestive blood the gentry, but if people are expected to out of steal loads and curb permissible of ages, it’s not salubrious to work. They united would contentedly espouse a feign pro tem anterior to people working order software and Network sites that twenty dozens it ridiculously teachable to infringer, and up the quality. If that happens, then there pass on be no stopping piracy. But they’re too watchful and shocked of losing. Risks prevail to be joyful!"



Yea I have seen a lot of spam that looks just like this recently. I have started using a capra on my blog comments to prevent most of them. Still they get through and post spam... What fun cleaning it all up.
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Rick in Texas
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jmpruitt
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@ Rick, I haven't added a captcha to mine yet, although more and more blogs are doing it. I should. are you using a plugin for it?

Hey, I am going to be in TX next week on vacation :) what part of the great state are you in?

@michellerana I know what you mean, in fact both of those are familiar. I think I got them on my own blogs. I love seeing the ones that could be relevant to your blog, but the post they show up on is soo far off the mark it is obvious that they are spam.
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gradyp
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Priceless....

Greetings everyone, This webpage is excellent and so is how the matter was expanded. I like some of the comments as well although I would prefer we all keep it on topic in order add value to the subject.


Funny... Since the comments are being MODERATED, guess what? They ARE on point, because only those are getting through! Only yours, telling everyone else to keep their's on topic, is the only one that ISN'T on topic.

:D

Got to love comment spammers. I'm sure Mark has a few more he could share with us to get us all rolling with laughter.

Grady
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andrewp
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gradyp wrote:Oh, you gotta love this one!

    Why have you deleted my post? It was very useful information and i assure atleast 1 person found it helpful unlike the rest of the comments on this website. I’ll post it again. Tired of getting low numbers of useless visitors for your website? Well i want to inform you of a brand new underground tactic that makes me personally $900 every day on 100% AUTOPILOT...


Have had one just like this, even tho that was his first post. From the posted examples i liked about Tuesday :). The last one didnt even make sense, maybe was created automatically.
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kakaboo
Posts: 257
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Today I got this:

I think one of your advertisements caused my internet browser to resize, you might want to put that on your blacklist.


Funny thing is... this is one of my sites that is totally ad-free, meaning no monetization of any sort yet since it's new.. LMAO
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gradyp
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Mark, have you had any other good blog comments to share?

Here's a couple I just found:

"Hello. I enjoyed “%BLOGTITLE%”. It was fine. Come to my blog sometime."

So close, but no cigar! :D

"Customer care is our top priority."

Okay... but why should I care?
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sethczerepak
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I like the comments that sound like they were copied and pasted out of a romance novel or fiction book. Like this one I got this morning:

"Anne gazed longingly at his lips, and she felt his fire within her. There must have been something else about his she wanted to know, but desperately feared."
Wow
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